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The Top 10 Reasons I Jumped Ship


May 1 2014

O
r as Jodie says, pulled a runner.

It is incredibly difficult for someone like me to pull a runner. My genetic code is ‘finish the job’, ‘see it through’, ‘you can do it’. Abandoning ship is the most unprofessional thing I’ve ever done so my guilty conscious forces me to recognize the legitimate reasons behind such a dramatic action. Intellectually I completely understand the whys but there is that little part of me that says, ‘you gave up’. Yep I sure did.

10. The coffee was a complete and utter horror – that is last only b/c I can significantly improve the state of things with a lovely French Press – life is too short for bad coffee!

9. Ugliest uniforms known to yacht. Don’t get me wrong I love the concept of a uniform, no thinking, just whip it on, braid the hair and I’m ready for my work day but these were particularly hideous.

8. White Rice, white flour, white potatoes. First off, rice was considered ‘peasant food’ and certain people in power did not eat it. Guess I’m a peasant and brown to boot. Food is energy, energy is critical for anyone to keep going and if the job requires 14 + hour days, then you better put the most nutrition packed food in me so I can keep moving.

7. Crew Carpet that was absolutely filthy. I sleep in white socks; my feet are the only part of my body that ever gets cold so I usual wander out in the a.m. in my socks until the first cup of joe is consumed. Well, my socks became black with muck! Ewww! Now you know owner carpet cleaned regularly but crew carpet? Hm? Made me wonder about crew care?

6. 409! Need I say more? Yes, people are all addicted to their cleaning products and waste gobs of money and resources and storage space but 409? Made me hack gross with every spray.

5. The amount of Diet Coke consumed. I am very suspicious of soda.

4. Amount of Sugar on vessel. Suspicious of soda and firmly convinced sugar is going to kill us. So much sugar was present, it crowded out everything else. Boat of death!

3. Within 48 hours of my arrival, a horror of a descriptive phrase popped into my head. It was so bad, it shocked potty mouth me! As everyone is aware, much of what I think pops out my mouth and the more tired I am the more things pop out. Stupid people I can ignore but mean people? Really, really hard not to alert them, maybe they want to change? It’s the therapist in me.

2. TMI Alert!!
My body shut down and did not pump and run effectively on all cylinders, if you know what I mean. My body is my power, it stands strong despite what I’ve thrown at it and when it screams, I listen.

1. No healthy snacks or snack time. Nope, we were supposed to eat breakfast before shift, lunch at noon hastily consumed so we could get right back to work, then dinner at six. Hm? When I tried to sneak some broccoli in at mid day, I was lectured and the broccoli was thrown out. Honestly this action by the Chief Stew put it over the top, the proverbial broccoli that broke the camels back. From lecture to off the boat took approximately two hours. Do not mess with this girl’s broccoli.

So now I can wash my hands of the guilt. I will forever remember my list of ten and know without one iota of doubt that running was the only sane option!